Catanduanes Forum

Identify - you don't need millions here. Ask Nang Biring in Kuripdas and she knows where the best part of the river is. She will not demand a conference table in some hotel for her to tell you. She will also just merely put her slippers on and act to show you, very much unlike our "honorables" who will need to sit down, debate, quarrel, put budget, quarrel more, point fingers on each noses, loose the budget and end up doing nothing except paper works.

We have wasted so much papers already not to mention the missing funds that go to another "honorable" who will "construct" a hotel straight away! No... Nang Biring is okay!

Lesson: Do it without fuss. Ask Nang Birings around the province to give you a list of those places for you...

Develop - Hmmm... JOM katatakot ninto! Anyway. Get that part of the river ready for the visitors. Nang Biring and her two sons can do that with "bareta" to construct mud steps to start with. They can make the steps concrete as they start getting their money from visitors!

Think of what kind of animals you want to attract there. You don't serve cakes straight away until you are ready to attract the CSC and capitol ladies to bathe there. Banana cue or camote cue, binamban, ibos, binot'ong, kinalu'ko, suman cooked with different colors like violet, green, blue and maybe some candy colors too, will attract some who will be your best mouth to proclaim to the world how beautiful the waterhole is!

No... get the "honorable" contractor out! you don't need them in most cases. The ordinary folk do them best anyway!

Puraran started it with only families parting with their meager salaries, not with my tax money.

Remember, if you serve bananas, more monkies will be attracted there. If we target the more monied monkies then you will need to get better bananas and perhaps wrapped the way the monied monkies want them wrapped! Simple! Then encourage more development of services as you realize more profits. No, "honorable" contractor... no space for you yet.

Lesson: Dont get too excited like the "honorables". Hotels are still far away. If ever, let Tang Coroy na negosiante do it and not the "honorables" who would use my tax money with their pockets in mind.

Package - Starting with millions for a monkey surfing competition will attract monkey surfers. They are very few ladies and gentlemen of the board. Very few... and you will spend millions for prizes alone not counting the sitting down over worhless meetings that cost equally more!

There are more monkeys who just need to be there.... sa higad ning sarog... than surfing monkies. You will not need millions for prizes too. You will only find out what kind of trees they would like to sleep in, what kind of bananas they eat and how they like their bananas served. Would they want coco-juice with their bananas? Would they like it served with Lungare's tuba? Those kind of questions when answered correctly will more likely to attract more monkies throughout the year than getting more millions for monkey surfing prizes! More monkies, less millions for prizes!

Package it! Maybe some monkies like to eat their bananas while listening to local music! Maybe they like silence, safety, privacy... we don't know... ask those monied monkies!

What we like is more monkies visiting thoughout the year than attracting less number of monied monkies with more money to go to other more beautiful trees in a more glorious riverbanks than going to Nang Biring's waterhole in the first place. Nope we want that group of monkies who come in droves first.

Mayayaman na okay kun agi-agi? mas mayad pa an sa simpleng ukay na sigi-sigi.

Lesson: Package the river to attract the most monkies. No "honorable" caterer.... Tang Coroy has the money for that. Don't waste my tax money!

We have lots to sell. We don't need millions to sell them. Involve Nang Biring and Tang Coroy na negosiante. Tax Money needed? ZERO!

Tourism is ...

I was wondering why half a kilometer of paved road costs millions! Anyway, that is where the "honorable" contractor and his frontseses get our tax money! Well, i was just wondering.

But yes, paved road to Nang Biring's waterhole will get more monkies in there easier and faster. The easier that waterhole is reached, the more monkies will go. AND the faster you can get there and out there, more monkies with less time to spend will be attracted! More money for nang Biring to construct more monkey business! Wow! More developments from just a road, honorables! Just a road please! And making it a decent and safe road will attract more decent and safety conscious monkies... more money!

Once money start flowing to Nang Birings river bank, stalls of monkey shirts, monkey souvenir shops, more better ways of serving monkies will be developed by Nang Biring's neighbors. In fact i won't wonder if Nang Biring will bring some of the neighbors to court for competition reasons! Wow that is development! Now, we need more judges here. he he he... Ayan Auntie Susan dadami ang iyong clients! 50/50 tayo dian!

And... Maybe Gov. Cua's RSL will operate from airport and pier to Nang Biring's Monkey Waterhole! How is that Honorable Governor?

And then there is Etasor, Manay Teng and Rico producing more singers, dancers and actors to perform in Nang Nang Biring's Waterhole!

And then, more of our local dances will be danced and ejoyed, music will air over the radio. Monkies like those while lying around the river banks! Believe you me.

And then, there is Lungare who will sell his tuba, Nang Kareng to sell her kurakding na linubihan, Mom Sonia Sorra's fantastic Pinangat will be Produced in Sorra's Pinangat factory, Dave Templonuevo's Itlog na Maalat will be produced by Dave's itlog na Pula factory... and other monkey factories will crop up opening more jobs for the people to serve more monkies... more taxes ini mga honorables!

Then some of the pili nuts vendors in the pier will be around Nang Biring's waterhole! Wow! Nuts for Monkies! Great business.

Then sea breeze proprietor will open up river breeze along Nang Biring's waterhole!

Then, Manay Lily Co will construct Mid-river Inn! Who knows Asian Ghost airlines will construct a heliport around there too!

And then, abaca's will be made into souvenir items, lasa will be made into decorative items.... See? the whole monkey island is getting chips of the monkey business of Nang Biring! Those are tax potentials my dear honorables! Good prospect for more corruptable tax money, bakong iyo?

And then CSC will offer courses that will cater to the growing demands of Nang Biring's Monkey Business. Woooo.... more work will be generated! Wow! More taxes for "honorable" corrupts to corrupt! ha ha ha.

I can imagine better and drier toilets, better beds according to demands of the day! Maybe, more electric driven gadgets will be needed for internet going monkies to be hooked to the monkey world! Those are infrastructure your honor. You need to supply them for Nang Biring's waterhole and Tang Gorios monkey-business to be sustained!

Think, your "honorables", of what they need and give it to them for other Nang Biring's to come up with more businesses to get those dollars out of those monkies' pockets!

Don't worry "honorables" that translates to more taxes paid by Nang Biring and Tang Coroy... There you go... he he he

Lesson: Don't start with corruption yet to start the Tourism Monkey Business. Get the whole island's business going first to get more businesses to thrive for more taxes... There you go! You'll have better and more tax money to play around with your fingers! ha ha ha

Tourism is ...

Oh no! No place for any "honorable" loggers. River will run out and Nang Biring will have no more river. Nang Biring and Tang Coroy will be out of business. There will be no more taxes your "honorable". No more taxes the 'honorable' can corrupt! Hala ka. So better protect the mountains for nang biring to prosper more, pay more taxes so the "honorable" corrupt can buy more houses out of the monkey island! ha ha ha.